Relationships are not the easiest way to find love and peace

They are specifically designed for finding (and showing) all the blocks that we have created on the Path to Self-Love. Relationships may begin with love, in love and for love (all the mush) but as they progress, they naturally bring out – into full view – all our unconscious programs/ conditioning of eons – our likes, dislikes, belief systems, judgments, compulsions, conformities, attachments, fears, insecurities, hidden loyalties, untruths etc. etc. etc.

Every relationship will, sooner or later, challenge us because that’s its purpose. It has to take us DEEPER into all our suppressed thoughts, feelings and experiences. That’s the mandate. That’s needed for our personal growth! (Closer a relationship, more the challenges.)

Unfortunately, most of us are not taught this crucial aspect of our relationships. We are simply told to keep all the angst under the wraps – don’t let the shit fly, lest it hits the ceiling – and just keep smiling; for the relationship’s sake.

Maintaining a superficial relationship (Hi, Hello, Good Morning, Happy Dussehra, Happy Birthday, Pairi Pauna etc. etc. etc.) becomes more important than going into the depths of our being – which the relationship is urging us to do – because no one wants any conflict (even though it may be simmering under the surface).

In the process, we lose out on the biggest benefits of a relationship – our personal growth. We stay where we are – or continue to grow slower than we can, if we do not pay full attention to the “energy blocks” that the relationship is pointing towards.

‘Duniyadari’ is all about pretending that all’s well, when it isn’t. Such pretence is fine for short term superficial relationships; but long-term relationships will keep throwing us in the deep end of the pool until we learn to swim in the ocean of love.

Relationships are the most important “workshops” we are enrolled in; but all we want is ‘fun times’; without doing the ‘tough work’ – however, crucial it might be for our growth.

No wonder most close relationships are in deep shit right now – it’s time to allow the shit to hit the fan – at least then we will urgently clean the mess and clear the air.

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Chitra Jha
Past life regression therapist, inner child healer

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